119462

Joke of the Day

"A driver gets pulled over for improper use of a carpool lane.. Cop: ""Carpool lane is 2 or more passengers and I don't see your second passenger."" Driver: ""well I'm just beside myself."""

Next Joke
 
"Why don't Muslims fight each other often? Cause they don't want no beef Edit: I'm going to crawl back into my hole now"
"[tells friend cat passed away] Is there anything I can do? Yes [holds up fur coat] put this on & lie in my lap But I- [starts crying] OK OK"
"What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons? Jose and Hoseb"
"We finally have definitive proof that Osama bin Laden is dead. He just registered to vote in Chicago."
"[2018] ALIEN: take me to ur leader ME: uh ok *takes him to president Donald Trump* ALIEN: lol good one but seriously where's ur real leader"
"What's a linguist's favorite beverage? IPA"
"Why did Toronto host the (hockey) World Junior Championships? They wanted to see what a winning team looked like."
"What did one toilet roll say to another toilet roll? People keep ripping me off."
"A WASP LANDED ON MY BARE FOOT AND NOW I KNOW HOW TO RIVERDANCE."