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Joke of the Day

"Science joke: What do you study to learn about acid? A pHD"

"How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? Nein."

"Cop:Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Because I'm pretty? Cop: No Me: Because I'm on Twitter? Cop: No Me: Officer I can do this all day"

"There's a lot of speculation about the new iPhone. It's expected to have a larger screen and a better operating system. Yes, the new iPhone will be called last year's Samsung Galaxy."

"Drilling into American House Walls is like paying into German Welfare risky as fuck."

"What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money."

"What disease do you get from kissing birds? Chirpes. It's one of those canarial diseases. They say it's untweetable."

"What do dolphins use to stay clean? All-porpoise cleaner."

"All animals are wild animals if you give them tequila and lift up their t-shirts."

"I'm not sure if my foots been asleep for the last 3 days or if I have diabetes."