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Joke of the Day

"If someone writes ""you are"" I immediately assume that they don't understand the difference between you're/your and are playing it safe."

"I covered my gf with dough and raisins and put her in the oven to annoy her. Hell hath no fury like a woman sconed"

"I promised myself to stop jacking off to porn... It's gonna be hard for the next couple weeks."

"If I could have any superpower, I would pick China."

"What's the difference between committing seppuku and impaling yourself with a sword? They're the same thing but committing seppuku comes with a little twist."

"You hear about all of these refugees? Sounds like a Syria's problem."

"Why are a German vegetarians pessimists? Because they always fear the wurst."

"""We have a new product, it washes hair but it needs a name"" Shamcrap?! ""Awful"" Shampoop?! ""Get out!"" Shampoo? ""Genius!"""

"NASA Says Signs of Water Flowing on Mars, Possible Niches for Life Willing to take a bath in that following water in Mars."

"Wanna hear a really cheesy joke? Just a warning, it's not that gouda. (made that one up during a slow night at work)"