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Joke of the Day

"The first time I got a universal remote control, I thought to myself ""This changes everything""."

"Dear Taliban, When you shoot a kid in the head for wanting an education and she doesn't die, how can you be sure that God is on your side?"

"Knock Knock, Islam Knock Knock Who's there? Allah Allah who? Allah who ackbar!!!! ***BOOM***"

"Why do people say its not you... it's me in a breakup? Yeah it's YOU, you're an idiot! I'm amazing... ask your brother!"

"Why do ninjas make bad porn stars? Because nobody can see them coming."

"What's the difference between the bird flu and the the swine flu? For bird flu you need tweetment, for swine flu you need oinkment."

"Needed one cotton ball. Two were left. Took both so one wouldn't feel lonely. I also have strong feelings about the last two pudding cups."

"My wife used to be a nun... But I got her out of the habit."

"I like my women like I like my Starbucks coffee. Left cold and empty with my name written across them."

"Why does a rapper need an umbrella? Fo' drizzle."