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Joke of the Day

"I know alcohol isn't the answer, but it's my best guess."

"Chicken and a frog found a book The chicken says ""book book book BOOK!'' The frog responds ''Read it Read it Read it!''"

"To the teenager that flipped me off for honking at you. Your phone is on top of your car."

"No Auto-correct, I never meant ""Relationship Goats""."

"What's the difference between refrigerators and gay people? Refrigerators don't fart when the meat gets pulled out"

"I've heard addicts claim that heroin became their ""God"" but... ...they're always taking his name in vein."

"[Cute Girl]: *in hot tub* Hey baby. Why don't you come join me? [Lobster]: No I'm good over here. That's how my dad died."

"""Do you know what this room needs? At least four paintings of lighthouses!"" white people"

"If laughter was the best medicine... Your face would cure the world!"

"Did you know Stalin got hit in the groin with a potato when he was young? That's how he became a dictator."