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Joke of the Day

"What's Donald's true political party? Whig"

"What do you call it when two designers argue about what file type to export a graphic to? Getting into a bit of a .tiff!"

"I always keep a gun in my pocket so people won't think I'm happy to see them."

"KAREN ADDISON: CHEAP DATE He took me to McDonald's, backed his car through the drive-through window, so the cashier could be on my side."

"Mom: a little birdie told me you got drunk last night Me: you're the one friggen talking to birds"

"People need to stop with all the gay jokes... ...I mean, come on guys."

"How do you stop a ginger from drowning? You throw him a lifesaver and tell him to grab on to it."

"What time does Sean Connery show up to wimbledon? Tennish"

"Some old man was driving 20Mph the whole way home, as if he'd never seen snow before. Boy everyone sure got mad at me."

"Nebraska bill allows K - 12 teachers to carry guns to school. In their defense, it is really hard to get a 9 year old to shut the fuck up."