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Joke of the Day

"Rome wasn't built in a day. But part of it was."

"INTERVIEWER: strengths? ME: I'm good at presenting both sides of an argument INTERVIEWER: great ME: which could also be a weakness..."

"Paid a homeless guy $1 for this: What's a pirate's favorite letter? (They will always say ""arrrrrrhh."") Nope, P, it's like arrrrrrhh without a leg."

"What do a thong and Bernie Sander's crazyman hairstyle have in common? They both barely cover a cunt."

"Bar So, a man walks into a bar and says ouch."

"How do we know that hamburgers love classic music? They're often found at the Meatropolitan Opera House and Cownegie Hall!"

"A mango told an apple ""I love you"" Actually it was a passionfruit, not a mango"

"Pretty rude of you to have a crush on someone else when I've done absolutely nothing to show I'm attracted to you."

"Here's a pie chart on procrastination."

"I just realized Alaska has some really weird city names Did Juneau that?"