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Joke of the Day

"Back to the Future IV: Marty Mcfly stops being obsessed with his own family and goes back in time to kill Hitler."

"Did you hear about the fire at the flame retardant textile manufacturer? Someone left the irony on..."

"Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's very time consuming."

"I recommend everyone to go swimming with piranhas. It's a once in a lifetime experience."

"""Describe 2016 in 4 words"" ""That's a tomorrow problem"""

"""Read 'em and weep"" I say as I lay down my hand: a collection of my grandparent's handwritten love letters from WWII."

"Blood's thicker than water, so remember to pull back on the flour a bit when you substitute it into your baking."

"When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water."

"I want to call my daughter Bellaillusions... because tricks are something a whore does for money."

"How do you get a 12 yr old to cry twice? (x-post from comments) Wipe your bloody dick on her teddy bear. And I'm off to hell."