77085

Joke of the Day

"They say breaking a mirror is the worst because you get 7 years bad luck OH PLEASE!!! Try breaking a condom!"

"Happy World Alzheimer's Day! Or was it yesterday??"

"I speak Swedish with an Ikea accent."

"Why did Willow Smith whip her hair? Because it has been very knotty. Apologies in advance"

"Q: what did one lumber jack say to another lumber jack? A: ""I need to axe you a question."""

"I heard women love a man in uniform.. Can't wait to start working at McDonalds."

"*waits for you to fall asleep* *rolls out from under your bed* *moisturizes your knees and elbows*"

"Did you know that if you pull off a lizard's tail it'll grow back? And if you pull it off again the lizard will be like, ""Dude, c'mon..."""

"I call my girl Attila because she's my Hun."

"Why did Night fall? Because Day tripped him."