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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a 4 year old boy and a bag of cocaine? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window."

"Spider-Man, hanging right in front of your face when you turn on the bathroom light."

"Give a man a jacket He'll be warm for the winter. Teach a man to jacket he won't leave the house."

"If someone notices you with an open zipper, answer proudly: professional habit."

"What form of radiation bakes you cookies? A gramma ray"

"The world is full of terrible people, but there's none so evil as the man who fries bacon right next door to the gym."

"Women who say, ""Awwww..."" after everything they hear are quite possibly the most annoying assholes on the planet."

"Once a guy at the grocery store yelled at me to stop talking on a banana like a phone so I hung up and shot him with it."

"What's the NSA's favourite game? I spy."

"When life gets tough, remember this: You were the strongest sperm."