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Joke of the Day

"What's the NSA's favourite game? I spy."

"My friend Dave drowned yesterday his funeral is on Wednesday. I've made him a wreath in the shape of a buoyancy aid. It's what he would have wanted."

"girl if we were pokemon you would be a pichu and i would be a raichu because im a convicted child molestor"

"I've always dreamed of swimming in an ocean of orange soda Its a fanta-sea of mine"

"If you have a referee in football what do you have in bowls? Cornflakes!"

"What are those small bumps around women's nipples? It's Braille for ""Suck Here"""

"And the award for best neckwear goes to... Well, would you look at that...it's a tie."

"First person ever: I HAVE SEVERAL HOLES IN MY FACE WHAT IS HAPPENING"

"One thing that I have never had in the glove box of my car, is a pair of gloves."

"Math and alcohol don't mix. Don't drink and derive."