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Joke of the Day

"The 9-year-old in me thinks life is all about fun. But then I think, how long is it gonna take to digest this kid? I'm a huge python, btw."

"You had me at let's get divorced."

"Why do gorillas have such big nostrils? Because they have big fingers"

"Pete and Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out, who was left? (Really?) Pete and Repeat were in a boat. Pete fell out, who was left?"

"What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside!"

"Knock knock. Who's there? The pilot, let me in! Credit to: /u/Squidward_On_Drugs on an AskReddit thread, wanted to share with r/jokes"

"I experienced a rape when I was 5... The babysitter never saw it coming."

"What is the biggest advantage of living in Switzerland? Well for starters the flag is a big plus."

"Going to a Yahtzee party. I hope that isn't slang for something gay. Well, gayer than Yahtzee."

"You love him. Your parents approve him. He buys you flowers and chocolate. He wrote you a poem that rhymes ""wood"" with ""food."""