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Joke of the Day

"CUT, CUT!! [Music stops] LOOK IT'S A WESTERN MUSICAL [Rubs temples] YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE COWBOY HAT ON- [Cat runs off] Meow!"

"What is a toad's favorite genre of music? Hip hop."

"When is my wifes favorite day for sex? Tomorrow"

"What was Hitler's favorite letter? I have no idea, but it was probably NOT Z."

"Why shouldn't you hang out with zombies? They make rotten friends"

"Did you hear about Stevie Wonder getting a cheese grater for his birthday? He said it was the most violent book he'd ever read."

"Marrige has 3 rings... The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering."

"What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a baby? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window."

"Therapy Me: she never tells me anything Her: He doesn't listen Me: that's bs gimme an example Her: I'm 8 months pregnant Me: WHOA"

"""OH GOD! OH GOD! OH GOD! OH GOD! OH GOD!Damn these thin walls. Don't know if my neighbors are having sex, praying or having a coronary."