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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a baby? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window."

"I hate flossing This morning, I brushed for literally twenty minutes just to put off flossing. My hair has never looked better."

"My dad is so cheap. He scolded me for running home behind the bus once, and saving the *fare. He said I should have run behind a taxi, and saved a lot more."

"My remaining Scrabble tiles were PENSI, so I played the name of a long, hard body part ... ... SPINE."

"Q. What's the definition of a Yankee? A. Same thing as a ""quickie"" only you do it yourself."

"I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey. But I turned myself around."

"What did the dead blues musician sing? ""Didn't wake up this morning..."""

"what was Michael Jackson favorite kind of movie child pornography"

"That show ""Catfish"" should just be called ""People Who Have Never Heard of Google."""

"What did the stamp say to the envelope? ""I've become attached to you."""