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Joke of the Day

"Why do people hate cliffhangers? Because the suspense is killing them."

"What happens when Nigel Farage makes a promise? He brexit."

"Can you get high off of viagra? Yes, but only if you lay on your stomach."

"The worst thing about being a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac ...is that you stay up all night contemplating the existence of dog."

"I am going bananas. That's what I say to my bananas before I leave in the morning."

"""The Force Awakens"" had 0 people riding giant CGI lizards. How is that even science fiction? They might as well rename it ""Downton Abbey."""

"The boy was so lazy that he got up a bit earlier so that he could do nothing for a bit longer."

"Whats the useless skin around the vagina called? The woman... Im sorry"

"Why is there no gambling in Africa? Too many cheetahs."

"A guy I work with farted on the elevator... It was wrong on so many levels."