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Joke of the Day

"Some women enjoy eye contact during oral sex on a gentleman Others say it stings."

"ALCOHOL. Because no good story ever began with, ""So, I was sitting there eating this salad..."""

"Me and my mates are in a band called Duvet. We're a cover band."

"Where did the hamburger meet the cheeseburger? At the meat ball."

"God, designing a toddler: ya know what would be hilarious would be if it has no ability to reason but talks nonstop. Also make it trip a lot"

"What do you call a banana you want tomorrow in spanish? Banana"

"What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded."

"I crossed the road, walked into the bar and changed a lightbulb. It was at that moment I realised my life was a joke."

"What do you call an elf that sings? A wrapper."

"Interviewer: ""What's your greatest accomplishment?"" Me: ""I was in a lot of people's MySpace Top 8s back in 2004."""