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Joke of the Day

"""Donatello choose ur weapon"" ""I'll take a stick"" ""Really not a sword? Nunchu.."" ""A STICK"" ""Ha I guess u wanna wear purple too?"" ""..."" ""Ugh"""

"I typed something into Google on my phone then held it to my ear. I felt stupid at first, but now I'm kinda mad that that doesn't work."

"How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ......All of it."

"7yo: ""Who's singing this?"" Me: ""Franz Ferdinand."" 7yo: ""But, he died in 1914."" Me:"

"Girl, are you an ITT Tech degree? Because you're worthless."

"I probably shouldn't have done ecstasy before work but oh my god the HR lady feels sooooo nice"

"""I lost my Khakis"" - a guy from Boston who lost his car keys."

"Why are the majority of school shooters white? Because the black kids don't wanna get kicked off the basketball team."

"What do you call a guy dumped by his Asian girlfriend? Disoriented."

"My jokes are like cancer Only my dad gets it."