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Joke of the Day

"Why are there no headache tablets in the jungle? Because the Parrots-eat-em-all. Thank you, I'm here all night."

"I have many hidden talents. Just wish I could find 'em."

"If you had to choose between voting for Trump or getting into the water with sharks, would you dive in or do a cannon ball?"

"I love the album Abbey Road so much I think I'm going to name my first daughter ""Road."""

"Ever hear the one about the midget and the razor blade? Me either, it got cut short."

"[on the phone with wife] Honey, who do you like better, Hulk Hogan or Jafar from Aladdin? ""Tell me why."" [winks at tattoo artist] No reason."

"I use a wheelchair. Whenever I'm at a job interview and they ask me what my greatest weakness is, I always want to say, ""Stairs""."

"Why do rappers repeat their names in their songs? So they dont forget it."

"Whenever we eat hummus my girlfriend always says to me.... HUMMUS IS YUMMUS!!!!!"

"The key to great joke tel TIMING! ling is"