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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between regular sex and anal sex? One makes your day and one makes your hole weak."

"If this cat doesn't stop trying to lick my plate, we're having Chinese for dinner tomorrow."

"What do you get when you cross a donkey with a jar of peanut butter? A piece of ass that sticks to the roof of your mouth!"

"Breaking news: The Irish have come up with a new use for sheep. Wool."

"Looking at your innocent 5 year old now, I bet you can't imagine him drinking and taking drugs. Just you wait. First grade can be brutal."

"What do you call it when you use your debit card to pay to have sex with a MtF illegal immigrant Paperless trans action"

"Has the airplane joke been posted yet? Eh never mind, it'll go over your head."

"I'm gonna open a business to wax chests with no pain at all. ...But can I really pull it off?"

"What's the hardest part of being a paedophile? The dick."

"I carry a permanent marker just in case someone without a mustache falls asleep."