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Joke of the Day

"WARNING ! ! ! This is a VIRUS . . . When you turn your phone off it WON'T WORK AGAIN.. U are a BITCH Beautiful Intelligent Talented Cute Hilarious r u smiling now? ? ? ? *YOU ARE REALLY BITCH*"

"My Dad wrote an ok joke Dad: You know Trump just wants to be a penis potato. Me: ...What? Dad: He wants to be a Dick-tator"

"I had a best friend who wore a gorilla suit everywhere... he was my prime-mate."

"What do you get when you divide a pumpkin's circumference by its diameter? Pumpkin pi!"

"What's the difference between Justin Bieber and Pinocchio? Some day, Pinocchio's going to be a real boy."

"Chuck Norris successfully seperated twins conjoined at the head by roundkicking them in the face."

"My wedding will be open casket."

"They call my mom Neutrogena she offers fast and effective hand relief for under five dollars."

"What do California zombies eat? Graaaiiins."

"Being single at this time is not based on my wanting freedom to do what I want....It's more due to the fact that I want the freedom to not have to do what someone else wants."