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Joke of the Day

"Bars are one of the few places that will solve your problems & create your problems at the same time."

"Why was Pavlov's hair so soft? Because classical conditioning!"

"Where do Eggs keep their holidays pictures? In a photo albumen..."

"Her: I'll sleep with you when pigs fly Me: points to police helicopter*"

"The year 4542, artifacts are discovered from our once flourishing civilization. ""Looks like they worshiped apples."" said one archeologist."

"I am used but in good condition."

"Geneticists and Teenage Boys are the same... They both want to unzip your genes."

"Sex to a man is like hunger. If he can't get into an expensive French restaurant, he will go to McDonalds."

"Kid: Waaaahhhhh! MY TOY IS BROKEN! Dad: Nothing a little duct tape can't fix. Kid: mrnm... mmrm.. rnmr..."

"The interviewer asked, ""Where do you see yourself in five years?"" The job candidate responded, "" I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision."" Use it while you can, people!"