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Joke of the Day
"So my girlfriend of five years asked me... . . ""Daddy, when is my 6th birthday?"""
Next Joke
"If I drank as little alcohol as I tell my doctor I'd weigh as little as I tell the people at the DMV when I renew my driver's license."
"I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis."
"How do you think the whole Deflategate situation feels to Tom Brady now? Probably doesn't feel how he prefers it to..."
"Please write another brilliant status about how high you are. I'm on the edge of my seat here."
"Why should everyone vote for Hillary Clinton? Because Bill said she doesn't suck"
"A lot of people say I'm condescending... (That means I talk down to people)"
"I walk around like everything is fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off."
"Ugly sweater day at work. I'm wearing a new, really nice expensive sweater but walking around saying ""ugh, please, this old thing."""
"A hamburger walks into a bar The bartender says we don't serve food here!"