71366

Joke of the Day

"Teacher : Tommy put some more water in the fish tank ! Pupil : Why Miss I only put some in yesterday and he hasn't drunk that yet !"

"A kid with A.D.D. walks in late for class... Look a squirrel!"

"If you screwed up something in a science lab, who do you tell? **Not** Neil deGrasse cause he will grass on you!"

"My first child has gone off to college and I feel a great emptiness in my life. Specifically, in my checking account."

"What is it that separates humans from animals? The Mediterranean Sea"

"The Water Fight Just had a water fight over the park with a bunch of local kids. I won! No one's a match for me and my kettle."

"My girlfriend broke up with me because I wouldn't have sex with her. She said ""Speak now or forever hold your piece"""

"""I'm a big fan of 50 cent. Or as he's known in Zimbabwe: four hundred million dollars."""

"What did the lesbian vampire say to her girlfriend? See you next month!"

"Never tell a joke to plutonium, there reaction is explosive"