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Joke of the Day

"when i was 17 my bucket list was ""buy a house"" & ""marry a tycoon"" now i'm 27 it's ""tickle a baby hedgehog"" and ""learn Beyonce choreography"""

"How do you sink a submarine full of blondes? you knock on the door."

"Jafar my name is jafar i come from afar there's a Note 7 in my car allahu akbar"

"What do you get when you cross a paraplegic and a Pentecostal? Faith-masturbation."

"A elderly man gets diagnosed with brain cancer And dies."

"Her dad said he'd like to see me make an honest woman out of her. I had to resist the urge to tell him that ship sailed long before me."

"According to my neighbor's diary, I have ""boundary issues""."

"[cops showing wife my body] ""Why is he 50m from where he got shot?"" ""Our best guess was he tried crawling home to clear his browser history"""

"Once this whole ""global warming thing"" melts the ice caps We're gonna have a canoe world order."

"What is the difference between ovaries and testicles? There is a vas diference"