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Joke of the Day

"""Bigotry"" -an Italian guy describing an oak"

"ME: I've brought you a house-warming present ESKIMO: You idiot"

"my new year resolution is 1080p thanks please make this go viral so my ex gf stephanie sees it steph if ur reading this please take me back"

"I was playing Words with Fiends I scored 50 points for using all my runes, but summoned Pazuzu."

"What was the working title for 10 Cloverfield Lane? ""You're not wrong, Walter, you're just an asshole."""

"When I'm bored, I like to superglue Doritos to my cat and make it run around the house like a stegosaurus."

"What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? Nobody ever wants to borrow my hippo :-("

"I want to start a business selling bait for fishing I plan to call it, ""Master Baiters & Tackle"""

"You'll never believe how much this girl paid me to have sex with her...... One vagina."

"Why can't America ever win a chess tournament? Because they're missing two towers"