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Joke of the Day

"*1st date* [Be cool, just dont let her know youre a 1st generation PS3] So where do y- *internal cooling fan drowns out entire conversation*"

"As Freud said ""Who cites, needs sex"""

"What is Niglish? You're an asshole. Just go away."

"Women are like magnets... I have no clue how they work."

"Robin Hood and Little John walking through the forest... Have fun getting that song out of your head."

"Where's the feminist world headquarters? Bancock"

"My puppy is a bastard son of a bitch His mother is a single mother"

"Did you hear about the guy who tried to mend his belt with watches? It was a waste of time"

"Wife: My family is coming over. Me: ....? Wife: PANTS! PUT ON PANTS!"

"If you're going to ride my ass at least pull my hair and make me scream!"