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Joke of the Day

"What does oral sex in a nursing home taste like? (shrugs shoulders) Depends."

"I went to a book store and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was She Said If She Told Me It Would Defeat The Purpose."

"""Shotgun!"" I yell as I push past the others and climb into the seat. I am subsequently escorted from the airplane."

"I'd rather drop a baby than my iPhone.... I mean I can make another baby, but I have no clue how to make an iPhone."

"so as I went in to vote this morning, an old lady told me to make sure I voted for the candidate that could make change. Boy, is my bank teller going to be surprised!"

"How does a muslim close a door? Islams it."

"What do you call a black hipster? blipster"

"As a Malaysian, I thought that our Prime Minister would be crowned the worst political leader of the century But it looks like America has finally decided to us their Trump card."

"A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide."

"Iv'e never been so proud of myself.. Just completed a jigsaw puzzle in 8 days.. It said 3-4 years on the box!!"