70008

Joke of the Day

"Two guys are drinking at the country club bar... First guy says, ""Hey, you want to go play some golf?"" Second guy says, ""No, not today."" ""Why not?"" ""Because I never drink and drive."""

"I ordered the chick on page 3 in the Victoria's Secret catalog... But all they sent me was her underwear."

"Pickup Line! on a scale of 1 to 10, you are a 9 and I'm the 1 you need."

"""Balls!"" cried the queen. ""If I had two I'd be king!"" The king laughed. He had to."

"What do you call a man who gives a woman the illusion of entitlement? A Husband..."

"BREAKING NEWS: Texas A&M Library burns to ground... Both books were completely destroyed. The worst part is, one of them wasn't even colored in yet."

"One of the reasons for the low number of female pilots has been found to be.. the cockpit !"

"""911? Help, my son has gone missing"" [baby lowers hands from eyes] ""Holy crap he just appeared out of nowhere"""

"The strangest thing happened. A coworker who always says, ""Living the dream"" was mysteriously stabbed 37 times in the neck with my car keys."

"I used to have a 2 year old son, he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died... For inspiration"