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Joke of the Day
"""Impeccable"" sounds like a general immunity to crow attacks..."
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"Old lady asked me to check her balance I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me to help check her balance, so I pushed her over"
"what do you call a mexican with a rubber toe? rubbertoe"
"What do you call a german that does the exact opposite of what he says to do? A hypokrout."
"Why are condoms and bungee-jumping similar? You're screwed if the rubber breaks."
"Remember when racism meant a political candidate wasn't viable? That was weird."
"To all those telling me this account is a sin - Don't worry about it, I plan on forgiving myself later"
"Bring in 2015 the same way you came into this world. Naked and screaming."
"I won $3 million on lottery this weekend. I decided to donate a quarter of it to Charity Now I have $2,999,999.75"
"I'm having a party for men with erectile dysfunction If you can't come let me know."