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Joke of the Day

"Ran out of Manila envelops. Off to the Philippines."

"Why did the girl who worked for the telephone company sing all the time? Because she was an operetta (operator)."

"Why did frosty the snowman pull down his pants? He heard the snowblower was coming by."

"M: Are you gonna eat that baby? Lady: What!!?! Go away you Sick-O' M: Sorry! I saw you putting it on Instagram & figured.. Never mind."

"What do you call the first Irish woman ever created? A McRib"

"Can someone help me decide which Nirvana album to buy? Wait, Nevermind"

"Tomorrow is the 4th of July which means one thing, it's going to be a really big day for nail art Instagram photos."

"What do you call a shoe with no grip? A slipper. (Made this up today, but almost definitely will have been made up before by someone else)"

"I'll never understand how Americans use cheese from tubes or slices as everyday food... We should definitely make America grate again."

"As a child I was obsessed with the difference between cosine and sine As I got older I realized it was just a phase"