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Joke of the Day

"When I smell weed coming from my neighbors house I call him pretending I'm the Mexican Cartel, and accuse him of stealing my drugs."

"Girl are you a qwerty keyboard? Because U and I were meant to be together."

"I stayed at my girlfriends house the other day but her dad wouldn't let us sleep together Which was a shame because he's really fit"

"I'm starting to forget how the alphabet goes... ABCDEFGHIJKLMFAO...."

"We don't need a girlfriend... Our assignments irritates us everyday... that's enough!!"

"A Short Offensive and Original Joke What did the man reply to his friend that found a good paying job taking care of mentally challenged people? Answer: Oh, so it has its ups and downs."

"Teacher: That's quite a cough you have there what are you taking for it? Pupil: I don't know teacher. What will you give me?"

"*Fakes Phone Call* ""Yes a thousand doves please....well give me pigeons and i can paint them white"" (cups hand over phone) ""I plan weddings"""

"I can't believe how racist star wars is. Of course the only black guy never knew his father."

"Before you have kids, practice yelling ""GET UP NOW OR I WILL TAKE YOU TO SCHOOL IN YOUR PAJAMAS!"" & see if it's right for you."