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Joke of the Day

"I suffer from Insomnia On the bright side; only 12 more sleeps til Christmas."

"My favorite thing to do after a nap is immediately take a second one."

"Space-X just used a multi-stage propellent catapult to send a small group of cattle into low-earth orbit. Its the first heard shot 'round the world."

"What do you get if you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo."

"I won't say I necessarily want to be in a relationship, but I will say its been hard to load a dishwasher with no feedback, whatsoever."

"Cashier's playing dumb cause I said ""venti"" at a non-Starbucks. You know what I mean, dude, just point me to the biggest dildo you guys got."

"Why didn't the girl like anal? Because she was always butthurt over it."

"Some women wear larger shirts to make their bodies feel smaller... I wear smaller condoms to make my penis feel larger"

"A feminist is seen bathing on the beach Oh wait, just a beached whale"

"I tried to catch fog yesterday, Mist."