69090

Joke of the Day

"My mom told me to quit smoking weed But I said fuck it I do what I marijuana"

"Did you hear the shocking news about Yahoo Today ? Apparently they still have 500 million users."

"Tell me your best ""When is a --- not a ---?"" joke I'll start you off: When is a door not a door? > When it's ajar! When are eyes not eyes? > When the wind makes them water!"

"[teen me w/GF in my dad's car] Me: You wanna do it? Her: *giggling* Yes Me: *hears voice whisper no glove, no love* GET OUT OF THE CAR MOM"

"What did Dave Grohl say when someone stole his Greek food? There goes my gyroooo"

"The Apple store in town got robbed last night the police have sent out an appeal for iWitnesses"

"Things not too say before a 3some: Of Course we're going to wait for your friend, she's the hot one."

"I don't consider it a good night out if it doesn't end up as a super villain's origin story"

"""Can I buy you a drink?"" ""I'd rather just have the money"""

"90's kids won't get this... Social Security benefits."