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Joke of the Day

"When I die, I'm not donating my body to science, but I might donate it to the English department and freak the shit out of some people."

"Boy that Neil Patrick Harris is a real, man's man."

"What are the aardvark's favorite Beatle's songs? It's Been an Aards Day's Night and I Want to Hold Your Ant!"

"After my grandfather's funeral... I scattered his remains all over my back garden. Which was horrible, because he hadn't been cremated."

"Just finished building Rome with Legos. Took me a day."

"Social Media For Drug Dealers It's called instagram"

"What do pancakes do when they are scared? They crepe themselves ;D"

"Someone threw a bottle of Omega 3 pills at me... I suffered super fish oil injuries."

"""Dad do you believe in Buddha?"" ""Why of course but I think margarine is just as good."""

"Why do white girls group in odd numbers? because they *can't even.*"