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Joke of the Day

"What did the egg play in the movie? The egg-stra."

"""Please add your phone number to secure your acct."" Facebook is now the Nigerian Prince."

"Chuck Norris farted once. He did it in the Sahara forest."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Blanche ! Blanche who ? Blanche not !"

"Why did Sauron buy the sedan instead of the coupe? More doors."

"The internet completely changed my sex life. I used to go to the bar every night trying to get laid. Now I'm just sit here masturbating."

"There's an Italian town where pasta is a currency A penne for their thoughts."

"I just saw a woman with a tremendous amount of make up and I was really tempted to use my finger and write ""wash me"" on her face"

"My cat ate her breakfast then vomited it all up. I'm a little worried about her health but she does look awesome in a bikini."

"My neighbor came pounding on my front door at 2am last night lucky for him, I was up practicing my bag pipes."