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Joke of the Day
"""Please add your phone number to secure your acct."" Facebook is now the Nigerian Prince."
Next Joke
"My doctor won't go away. I know what you're thinking but he has been eating small pieces of apple over many decades to build up an immunity."
"What's the difference between Trump and Dave Who the hell is Trump?"
"Did you hear the one about the girl with a seashell tattoo on her inner thigh? If you put your ear up next to it, you can smell the ocean."
"When a chicken pukes at a party... is that called a PARTY FOWL???"
"Quidditch. Scratching yourself with a pound coin."
"Everyone thought you could get a writing job from twitter but that never happens anymore its only for things like becoming the president"
"Why did the nutty kid throw butter out of the window? He wanted to see a butterfly."
"Some choices are easier than others: An emergency doctor's appt vs a much needed hair appt. At least if I die my hair will be cute."
"Can I fax something to you? 'Could you fax over a copy?' 'No, I can't fax because of where I live' 'Where do you live?' 'The 21st century'"