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Joke of the Day

"According to the police, public masturbation is not considered a ""street performance"". Even if you have a hat on the ground on front of you."

"I often fantasize about lying naked in bed, surrounded by various bags of chips and I have octopus arms so I can eat all the chips at once."

"I was sitting on the toilet, constipated... The undropped turd asked me, ""Man, what did you eat?!"" ""A pound of cheese,"" I said. The turd said, ""You're shittin' me."" I said, ""I shit you not."""

"They say swearing is due to limited vocabulary. I know thousands of words, but I still prefer' f*ck off' to go away'."

"The masochist and the sadist. What did the masochist say to the sadist? ""Hit me."" What did the sadist say to the masochist? ""No."""

"A WOMAN IS ONLY GOOD FOR ONE THING! Being an equal partner in a loving relationship."

"What do you call a deaf gynecologist? A lip reader"

"Women's soccer"

"The secret to making a truly tasty vegan burger is to use beef."

"Do you like snow? Yes Or Snow"