66765

Joke of the Day

"[my cell phone rings] ME (a person who pays a monthly fee to allow this): Ugh why is this happening"

"So the invisible man masturbated the other day No one saw him coming."

"what to ketchup and a condom have in common? they both go on your weenie"

"funny how 8 glasses of water a day seems impossible, but 8 beers a day seems necessary"

"What's the difference between love, true love, and showing off? Spit, swallow and gargle."

"What do you call a Graveyard built on sandstone? A sedimentary."

"Grocery stores nowadays have amazing selection We have powdered milk, powdered orange juice, powdered eggs, baby powder..."

"What do you call a fat computer? Adele."

"I'm not good at many things. But incest is where I come into my own."

"""The Great Gatsby"" is an awesome book about a rich guy who can't get laid."