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Joke of the Day

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Black lives matter."

"I bought shoes from a drug dealer... I don't know what he laced it with,but I've been tripping all day."

"What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had ? The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had !"

"What do you tell someone annoying you need a moment? One sec, cunt."

"""All the single ladies... All the single ladies... All the single ladies..."" - list of girls who wouldn't talk to me in high school"

"I used to be Irish... Then I became completely full of ire."

"Hey, Baby, you work for the TSA? 'Cause I've got a suspicious package, and I need you to blow it."

"TIL that Charlie Sheen got HIV after doing Two and a Half Men."

"Pretty disappointed to find out that ""Toys for Tots"" isn't a program where I trade my kids's toys for delicious tater tots."

"How is a Christmas tree like a man who's had a vasectomy? They both have ornamental balls."