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Joke of the Day

"I'm kinda terrified for 2015 2 + 0 + 1 + 5 = 8. The EXACT number of nipples Hitler would've had if he had 6 more nipples!"

"The early bird gets the worm. But the rest of the birds can get McGriddles until 10:30."

"""Dark Side Tech Support."" ""Hi. My hand lightning won't work. The hate's flowing thru me, but nada."" ""Try turning the hate off & on again."""

"I'm just like the ghostbusters, except I chase squirrels around my neighborhood with a vacuum cleaner"

"Did you hear about the ancient bisexual motorcycle gang made up of Norse monarchs? They're called the bi-kings"

"Which actor is resting in pieces? Alan RIPman"

"Clinton still leads Trump by 2! FBI Investigations."

"Why isn't the speed of light Asian? Because it never gets better than a 'C'."

"I almost had a threesome yesterday... i just needed two more people."

"The best part of finishing a long piece of writing is when the laptop hits your talentless loser foot as you boot it off a roof."