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Joke of the Day

"Just another lawyer joke Lawyer: ""Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"" Witness: ""By death."" Lawyer: ""And by whose death was it terminated?"""

"My shower had a bit of mildew- -but all it took was a little... scrubbing!!!"

"I hate when people ask what I hope to be doing in 5 years time I mean come on, I don't have 2020 vision"

"I know a woman who owns a taser... Let me tell you, she's stunning!"

"Rabbi So today I was wondering, when a rabbi performs a circumsision, does he get paid or does he just keep the tips?"

"My mate in Scotland reckons his scrotum got to -273 degrees last night. I reckon that's absolute bollocks"

"""I donno. America's Got Ghosts?"" -- someone in charge of a channel I probably pay $10 a year for and never watch."

"I'm such a slave to the man working on a Saturday night. A drunk slave but whatever. Atleast my e-mails to my boss are hilarious now."

"A little bit of racism Scientists have found that your fingerprints may indicate that you are black or white. For example, if your fingerprints were found at the crime scene, you're probably black."

"What's the difference between Trump and Clinton? 62 Electoral Votes"