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Joke of the Day

"A little bit of racism Scientists have found that your fingerprints may indicate that you are black or white. For example, if your fingerprints were found at the crime scene, you're probably black."

Next Joke
 
"me: Did you brush your teeth? 9: Yes me *hands him a glass of orange juice* 9: Do I have to? me: Yep. Told you not to touch my Cheetos"
"How is a speech impediment like a box of chocolates? It doesn't really matter, as long as it has good cocoa content."
"I do an average of 6 things a day that will keep me out of heaven."
"Grabs intercom: ANYONE WHO WOULD LIKE TO JOIN MY MILITIA, STAY HERE! WE ARE GOING TO OCCUPY THIS OLIVE GARDEN UNTIL I GET MORE BREADSTICKS"
"Finally goes to open-mic night. gets on stage. bombs so badly gets arrested for terrorism. #BucketListFails"
"DON'T STOP BELIEVING! .....but feel free to be somewhat skeptical from time-to-time"
"I invented a new sex position called the JFK I splatter all over her while she feverishly tries to get out of the car."
"Knock, knock. Who's there? Disappointment."
"What's green and smells like bacon? Kermit's fingers."