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Joke of the Day

"""I donno. America's Got Ghosts?"" -- someone in charge of a channel I probably pay $10 a year for and never watch."

"I just turned my desktop keyboard upside down, shook it, and a taco salad fell out. At least it tasted like a taco salad."

"If what people thought of you, what you thought of yourself and who you really are ever met, the three of you wouldn't recognize each other."

"Where did Mary go during the bombing? Everywhere"

"What PC does Adele use? A Dell."

"In LGBTQ families... We need more transparency."

"Did you know that the idea of recycling actually came about from a group of pirates? They came up with the idea of the four R's."

"Bad day? Listen to 90s rap. Problem solved. Unmotivated? Listen to 90s rap. Problem solved. Don't like rap? Listen to 90s rap Problem solved"

"If you take the D out of Devil what do you get? the D"

"If 80s movies taught me anything, it's that anyone with a sweater tied around their shoulders is a villain"