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Joke of the Day

"The Little Mermaid (1989) The story of a girl who realizes that she should change EVERYTHING about herself to land a good man..."

"My personal trainer told me to listen to my body at the gym so I punched him in the face and went to get some ice cream."

"I like my women like I like my coffee Ground up and stored in the freezer... ** Stolen from a TV comic I heard, to I take no credit, here"

"What's a dentist's favorite time of day? Tooth-hurty I'll show myself out"

"New laws Do not let your friends derive drunk."

"On a recent flight I was surprised to be served breakfast. Although it was only plane yogurt."

"Catch a baby opossum, give it a 12-hr sedative, and hide it in the glove compartment of the car of the person who's dating your ex."

"What did the number do when it divided from its companion? Changed its status from 'In A Relationship' to 'Single'."

"What did the Hammerhead say to the Great White as they parted ways? I guess I'll see you around chum."

"Man walks into library & asks if they have any books on bukkake. The librarian replies, ""A lot of people come for that."""