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Joke of the Day

"Only France would name a city ""to lose."""

"If aliens are only on the quest for intelligent life, then Earth really has nothing to worry about."

"Little Kid: wanna hear a joke? Me: life is meaningless without death Little Kid: why did the chicken cro- wait what?"

"Chuck Norris... ...played a used game once... on the Xbox One."

"911: What's you're emergency? ME: You mean ""your""? 911: OK. So..? ME: Someone's murdering me 911: You mean ""murdered"" ME:.. 911: [dial tone]"

"What do you get if you drop a piano on a team's defence? A flat back four!"

"Do you know the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke..."

"Just started a new exercise program where I put on a gorilla mask and chase a random toddler through Costco."

"I'm holding a latte and a scone while I break into this Audi so people think it's mine and I've locked my keys in it."

"Mount Rushmore looks like an old boy band that now wants to be taken seriously as musicians."