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Joke of the Day

"What do you call space herpes? Star Warts."

"What kind of jokestuff do farmers like? Corny jokes."

"Why did god give women two sets of lips? So they can piss and moan at the same time."

"Why did FIFA have surgery? They had to remove their Blatter."

"Fred: Betty has lovely long red hair all down her back. Harry: Pity it's not on her head!"

"Whenever you see me on screen, just know there's a highly likely chance I was 20% acting and 80% thinking about what's for lunch"

"I heard a joke about the swiss the other day But the punch line was too cheesy to repeat."

"My 2-year-old ate the crust off her pizza but left the cheese and pepperoni untouched. Apparently I'm raising the Antichrist."

"Q: What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Cancer."

"How many Police Officers does it take to handcuff one man? Nine, Eight to shoot him and one to say he was very dangerous"