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Joke of the Day

"Politicians are like diapers.... They must be changed often and for the same reason."

"TIL that vaccines contain a small amount of mercury, a chemical component that leads to autism. -Idiotic Soccer Mom, 2k16"

"A group of ventriloquists was murdered yesterday. Their screams were heard a mile away."

"There are three rings that come with every marriage... First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, and lastly the suffering."

"I used to be a plastic surgeon. That raised a few eyebrows..."

"TIL Why homosexuals dress so nicely. It's because they spend most of their time in the closet."

"I booked an hotel in kenya on walking distance from the beach... You can't imagine how far those kenyans will walk. [source: philip geubels, Belgian comedian]"

"What do you call an exploding box? Your new Note 7 package"

"My girlfriend and I played footsie at the family table and I climaxed. Turns out it was her grandma. I guess I got off on the wrong foot."

"Russell Crowe arrested for cannibalism After been asked by the judge did he have any regrets for eating the female victim, Russell shook his head and said he was ""Glad he ate 'er"""