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Joke of the Day

"I'm not going to heaven because I'm afraid of heights."

"When I jerk off I like to sit on my other hand until it gets numb, then change to that hand right at the last minute . . . I call it ""the old 'bate and switch""!"

"This could be the LSD talking, but I'm pretty sure I'd be more comfortable riding on the roof of the car."

"Bernie Sanders has no chance as long as Theres a Trump virus going around on this website?"

"What is a collie puppy's favorite toy? A chew-chew train!"

"What did storm say when she saw wolverine chopping wood? That's a huge axe man!"

"All this talk about Trump hating immigrants... Yet he married two of them."

"My favorite sex position is the Ronald Reagan cause i'll bang russia and break a wall did it suck?"

"Why did the one eyed banker lose his job? He didn't have any debtperception."

"What do you call a cow with no legs? A cow with no legs of course. HA got heeem."