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Joke of the Day

"Why can't you put two dicks in one condom? Because it's too hard..."

"When I was young I had to go to walking school. It was tough. They really put you through your paces there"

"Being drunk is a very unpleasant experience... Just ask a glass of water."

"I saw the army of Lichtenstein the other day. He was a really nice guy."

"Fishing for Jupiter fart fish off the wing of the space shuttle."

"A robber walks into a bank... ...and shouts ""This is a fuck up!"", The bank teller say's ""Don't you mean a hold up?"" to which the robber replies ""No its a fuck up, I left my gun in the car!"""

"What has four legs, and if it fell out of a tree it'd kill you? A pool table"

"Hungry? The hell with a snickers. Look to her cleavage, you'll find at least two snacks there and maybe some stray popcorn."

"What if aliens are responsible for global warming? And this is just their way of breaking the ice."

"George Washington: We should put 'We trust in God' on our money Thomas Jefferson: Great idea. Did you get that? Yoda (taking notes): Yep"