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Joke of the Day
"Why do vegetarians give good head? Because they are used to eating nuts!"
Next Joke
"My 'home to pants off' speed ratio is unparalleled."
"Flirting is dangerous business. One wrong move and you're committed."
"Zoo Keeper:""I've lost one of my elephants"" Other Zoo Keeper:""Why don't you put an advert in the paper?"" Zoo Keeper:""Don't be silly he can't read!"""
"Whats E.T.'s first name? Yodela"
"What do a dwarf and a midget have in common? Very little."
"When telling a joke to a German, it's very important to remember the rule of three. They have a very drei sense of humor."
"[I open my lunchbox to find pair of wife's underwear] But that means... [Cut to my wife opening her lunchbox to find a pair of my underwear]"
"A few weeks ago I mentioned toilet paper in a tweet and got toilet paper in the mail. So, here goes: dragons."
"Trying to argue via text is like Being Italian and talking with handcuffs on."